By: Tatjana Popovic, M.Ed., RBA (Ont), BCBA
It’s 2 a.m. You’ve already been up once. Your toddler is crying again, and you know exactly what’s about to happen: you’ll go in, settle them, wait until they’re asleep, creep back to bed, and do it all over again in an hour.
When it happens once in a while, you can push through it. But when it’s happening every night, multiple times a night, for weeks on end, it stops feeling like a phase and starts feeling like a problem.
All toddlers wake during the night
Every child, regardless of age, wakes briefly multiple times during the night. These arousals happen naturally between sleep cycles, typically four to six times per night. Adults do it too. We just don’t remember it because we’ve learned to roll over and fall back asleep without fully waking up.
A toddler who “sleeps through the night” is able to self-soothe during those brief arousals. That helps them fall back asleep so quickly that neither they nor you are aware it happened. But if your toddler struggles to self-soothe, they’re likely crying, calling out, or coming to you during those night wakes.
Five common reasons your toddler keeps waking up
If your toddler’s night wakings have become a pattern, one or more of these factors is usually involved.
1. Sleep-onset associations
This is the most common driver of frequent night wakings in toddlers. If your child falls asleep with you present (being rocked, held, or lying next to them) and then wakes during the night without you there, they don’t know how to get back to sleep. The conditions at the start of the night don’t match the conditions in the middle of the night, and that gap is what causes the waking to become a full wake-up.
Research on early childhood sleep consistently shows that children who require parental presence to fall asleep are more likely to wake frequently and have longer periods of wakefulness during the night. It’s one of the most well-documented patterns in pediatric sleep.
2. Schedule misalignment
Your toddler’s sleep schedule may not match their actual sleep needs. This can go in two directions.
Too much daytime sleep. If your toddler is napping too long or too late in the day, they may not have enough sleep pressure built up by bedtime. This leads to difficulty falling asleep, which then carries into the night. For toddlers over 12 months who are still on two naps, the total daytime sleep may be more than they need, causing fragmented overnight sleep.
Not enough daytime sleep or too late a bedtime. On the flip side, a toddler who is overtired can have more difficulty staying asleep. When children are overtired, their bodies produce cortisol (a stress hormone), which can fragment sleep and cause early morning wakings.
3. Environmental factors
Things in your child’s sleep environment that may not seem like a big deal can cause repeated wakings. Light coming through the window at 5 a.m. Temperature shifts in the room overnight. Noise from another part of the house. A room that’s too warm or too cold. These don’t cause every waking, but they can turn a brief natural arousal into a full wake-up.
4. Bedtime that’s become a negotiation
For toddlers who are verbal and mobile, bedtime resistance often goes hand in hand with night wakings. If bedtime involves repeated requests for more water, more stories, and more hugs, the limit-setting challenge at bedtime may be connected to the night waking pattern. A child who has learned that protesting at bedtime extends the interaction may apply the same approach during the night.
5. Medical factors
In some cases, night wakings have a medical cause. Obstructive sleep apnea (often signalled by snoring three or more nights a week), gastroesophageal reflux, chronic nasal congestion, eczema, anemia, and ear infections can all disrupt sleep. If your toddler’s night wakings are accompanied by snoring, gasping, mouth breathing, or signs of physical discomfort, talk to your pediatrician before making any behavioural changes.
What you can do right now
If you’ve ruled out medical concerns and the night wakings have been going on for more than a couple of weeks, here are practical steps you can take.
Start at bedtime, not in the middle of the night
The most effective place to address night wakings is at bedtime. How your child falls asleep at the start of the night sets the conditions for the rest of the night. If you change nothing about bedtime but try to respond differently at 2 a.m., you’re working against the pattern instead of with it.
Focus on helping your child fall asleep at bedtime under the same conditions they’ll find when they wake during the night. That means falling asleep in their crib or bed, in a dark room, without you actively helping them get to sleep.
Review the schedule
Check that your toddler’s nap and bedtime timing are appropriate for their age. For most toddlers (ages 1-3), one nap of about 1-2 hours in the early afternoon works well, with a bedtime that allows for an age-appropriate last wake window (typically 4-6 hours between the end of the nap and bedtime). If the nap is running too long or too late, the overnight sleep will feel the impact.
Tighten up the sleep environment
Make the room as dark as possible (blackout curtains are worth it). Set the temperature to around 18-20°C. Use white noise if there are unpredictable sounds in your home. Remove anything stimulating from the sleep space. These are small changes, but they reduce the chance that a natural nighttime arousal turns into a full wake-up.
Be consistent in your response
However you decide to respond to night wakings, consistency is what makes it work. If you rock your child back to sleep at midnight but try to let them settle on their own at 3 a.m., the inconsistency sends mixed signals and extends the problem.
Pick an approach you can stick with every night, even on the hard nights. That consistency is what allows your child to learn the new pattern.
When to get professional help
If you’ve been working on this for a few weeks with no improvement, or if you’re not sure whether the wakings are behavioural, developmental, or medical, a professional assessment can help you sort it out.
As a Registered Behaviour Analyst, I specialize in identifying the function behind your child’s sleep behaviours and building a plan that addresses the specific factors involved. Sometimes the answer is a schedule adjustment. Sometimes it’s a bedtime association that needs to shift. Often, it’s a combination of factors that need to be addressed in the right order.
The goal isn’t just fewer wakings. It’s helping your child develop the skills to sleep through the night independently, so that when they do wake briefly (as all children do), they can settle back to sleep on their own.
Book a free consultation to talk through your child’s night waking pattern and find out what’s driving it.
This post is for educational purposes and does not replace individualized professional support. If you have concerns about your child’s sleep or health, consult with a qualified professional.
Tatjana Popovic is a Registered Behaviour Analyst in Ontario, regulated by the College of Psychologists and Behaviour Analysts of Ontario (CPBAO), and a Board Certified Behaviour Analyst (BCBA). She provides virtual sleep and behaviour consultation across Ontario through The Restful Path.
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